There are times in our lives when we all need a little help. Nobody is completely self-sufficient, and when we have children we find ourselves relying on people more than ever before. For single mums in particular, getting the support you need from family, friends, your children's school and your workplace is vital.
Understanding from Work
If you are a new single mum, it often makes sense to explain your predicament to your boss. In the past there were two of you if a child or childminder became ill, now everything most likely will fall on your plate.
You may have to change your hours to accommodate your children's schedule, and you may have to give up trips out of town, at least in the near future. You may even have to move into new accommodation, which could make it difficult for you to get to work on time.
Family-friendly workplaces are the ideal, but unfortunately they're not all that common. If your employer starts giving you a hard time when you need some understanding, contact your local Citizen's Advice office for legal advice. You may be entitled to more care than you're getting.
Assistance from School
While you don't want to involve your child's school into your personal life, sometimes they need to know a little bit about what's going on. If you're finding it hard to make ends meet, for example, they may tell you how to get free uniforms or school lunches. They also might be a bit more understanding if you cannot donate to the cost of school trips.
Schools can help in other ways as well. That may mean providing you with practical support such as getting your children into the Breakfast Club or After-School Club on short notice, or enrolling them in a holiday playscheme run by the school. You never know until you ask.
Working Parent Support Checker
See what financial support a working parent could be entitled to, from free childcare hours and tax-free childcare to Child Benefit and Universal Credit help.
Try our Working Parent Support Checker free, here on this site →Relying on Family
Don't be afraid to ask your family for help. Sometimes that can be difficult, especially if you may be facing an “I told you so” attitude from certain relatives. But swallow your pride and get the help you need. It might come a lot more easily than you think.
Families can be great when it comes to babysitting, looking after children for the weekend, or doing either end of the school run. Hopefully, they can also be relied on to do favours on short notice, if they live close enough, without making you feeling too guilty. Take advantage of it if you're lucky enough to have relatives on hand. A family support network is worth its weight in gold.
Help from Friends
When you become single, it's inevitable that some friends seem to fall by the wayside. Luckily, there are others who will stick with you through thick and thin. Value them and don't be embarrassed to ask for help or support. The old cliché is true: that's what friends are for.
Remember, it's always a good idea to offer to do a bit of free babysitting or childminding for friends who have helped you out in the past. Then you won't feel bad when you ask them for a favour in future!
Your situation may be slightly different. ask a question below ↓ and our editorial team will reply with our advice.
The Kindness of Strangers
Sometimes you need someone who is in the same situation to really understand what you are going through. There are several lone parents networks out there which offer help for single mums coping alone, as well as organisations that provide practical, emotional and legal advice. Ask for support when you need it.
A Survival Guide that Works
Many single mums find it difficult to cope on their own, and who wouldn't? It can be hard enough to have children when there are two parents around to look after their every needs. But while many single mums want to do it all, in reality that's not possible.
Getting the support you need from the right people is crucial to keeping everything running smoothly – both for your sake, and the sake of your children. Surviving is possible if you make use of all the resources you have, and that means making use of the help that is out there. It's there for a reason. Use it.
As you can see, it is not always mums
I would like advise. I am in the process of just seperating from my husband. He is a EU citizen. I am from another country and we immigrated to the uk in 1 June 2020. We got married in SA 2015. We do not have any kids together but he was the sole provider for me and my 14 year old son. He is working and I have been job hunting actively Since August. I made an application for universal credit and child benefit in 26 Oct 2020. And we are still living together but I want to seperate soon. What is my rights and am I still entitled to claim? For housing which we renting and for my child? Is there anything else I can claim for. Reason im still with him is because i an scared and have no money or work and would be able to survive and take care of my son. But its becoming too much. Please assist with advise and feedback urgently.
I received conselling and I feel so much happier and better the best thing I I've become so much stronger and in better place and my daughter is always getting good feedbacks from school so all in all happy.
S
age 18 11 an
Want to know how much child tax credits and family tax credits amintitled to
Ask A Working Mum a question
Ask our editorial team a question and we will reply with our advice. Tell us as much about your situation as you can: the more detail you give, the more useful our answer can be.
You do not need to use your real name. Please do not include your full address, phone number, email address, or the names of other people. We may edit or remove identifying details for privacy and legal reasons.
Comments are moderated before publication.